Toby
Member
Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 3034 |
quote: Originally posted by BobbyMike
Perhaps the problem here is perception and experience.
I think those are contributing factors, but I think logic and reason are lacking in parts of the 'debate' as well.
quote: When I was 16 I said and did many things that were stupid, and or hurtful, to others. 22 years later I find myself in the position that I am not only not doing that, I also try to give other people a break (ok, count backwards from 10..9..8..7..etc.) when they say thoughtless, pointless, hurtful, etc. things. If they continue after I ask them to stop, or tell them how it struck me, I ignore them and go on my merry way.
Well, I think the flaw here would be to assume that this is universally true of others. Too often, IMO, people fall into the trap of "I think this way, so others must automatically think this way as well, and if they don't they're stupid". Now, perhaps being in a fairly rare temperament type (and hence rarely finding someone who thinks like me) gives me a different perspective on this. I guess it's that green blood thing.
quote: [...] My point (it seems to be shared by a few others) is that there is a community of people here trying to be that (a community) despite our differences. Can we do that? I think we can if we consider other people first.
Ultimately, that's what it boils down to.
quote: If you feel the need, bblue, to test whether or not you are being unjustly hounded by your detractors by all means come up with another profile and post as many replies as you do now. If you don't end up being locked out, you're right. If you do end up being locked out, will you concede that you're doing something wrong (if that's too strong a word, put your own there) and modify your actions?
The flaw in this scenario is a Hawthorne-type effect. Would there only be less problems because of modifying one's behavior under that different account. Seems like an unnecessary and unscientific way to solve the problem to me. Modifying the behavior that causes the problem is the only 'real' solution. Perhaps there will be some residual fall-out from past behavior, but if one continues the sincere effort, I have no doubt that it will stop. Keywords here being 'continue' and 'sincere effort'. Without those, don't bother.
quote: People come here for a reason. I don't think most of us come here to fight, argue with, or hound others.
That's the exact reason I come here, actually (as evidenced by my obscene post per day ratio). ;�~~~
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